My mommy always said there were no monsters – no real ones – but there are.
Yes, there are, aren’t there?
Why do they tell little kids that?
Most of the time it’s true.
The next LUC Briefing will be on the subject of: Music
i. Kim Jong Il’s Monster Movie
From an article on Vanity Fair:
“There were thousands dying in North Korea,” Fischer wrote via e-mail, “but at the same time here comes Kim Jong Il, and his idea of advancing the regime’’s purposes is to kidnap two South Korean filmmakers, trick some Japanese film crew members, drown them all in gifts and luxury, to play with rubber monster suits and make a Godzilla rip-off.”
ii. Operating Jabba The Hutt
According to the marvellous short documentary “Slimy Piece of Worm-Ridden Filth – Life Inside Jabba the Hutt”, being one of the several puppeteers who operated Jabba The Hutt in Return Of The Jedi was even less fun than you may have imagined it would be…
iii. King Kong Lives (With a Computerised Heart)
Plot synopsis from Wikipedia of the 1986 sequel to the lamentable 1976 version of King Kong:
“King Kong, after being shot down from the World Trade Center, is kept alive in a coma for about 10 years at the Atlanta Institute, under the care of surgeon Dr. Amy Franklin (Linda Hamilton). In order to save Kong’s life, Dr. Franklin must perform a heart transplant and give Kong a computer-monitored artificial heart. However, he lost so much blood that a transfusion is badly needed, and to complicate matters, Franklin says there is no species of ape or other animal whose blood type matches Kong’s. Enter adventurer, and eventual love interest, Hank “Mitch” Mitchell (Brian Kerwin), who goes to Borneo (Mitchell theorizes that Borneo and the island from the first movie were once part of the same landmass) and captures a giant female gorilla who is dubbed “Lady Kong.” Mitchell brings her to the Institute so her blood can be used for King Kong’s operation. The transfusion and the heart transplant are a success, but Kong escapes along with Lady Kong.”
If you really want to, you can watch the trailer here:
iv. The Gingerdead Man
Is anyone genuinely surprised that when it came to casting a psychotic, murdering cake monster, the producers turned to Gary Busey?
v. Zombie Movies Are a Metaphor for the State of Society
Monstrous creatures and characters can often be explained as metaphors for exploring the worries and concerns of the author or filmmaker that created them.
Vampires are all about sex, alien invasions stories are often grounded in xenophobia and racism and the monsters in Troll 2 are literally an embodiment of the evils of vegetarianism.
Zombies seem to be more of a (slowly) moving target. Previously used as a critique of our blind consumerist nature, Zombie movies have changed since the turn of the millennium to express more contemporary fears and anxieties. All is explained in this article on Wired:
“This continues a long and distinguished history of zombie themes standing in for au courant topics like slave rebellion, communism, über-capitalism, technophobia, and globalization. However, how zombie tales—and their fans—deal with these issues has proven as problematic as, well, the problems themselves.”
vi. Werner Herzog vs The Loch Ness Monster
Expressed as an equation:
Incident At Loch Ness = (Exit Trough The Gift Shop + Jaws) x (Grizzly Man / The Blair Witch Project)
vii. Godzilla & Godzooky
Producer Joseph Barbera putting a brave face on things:
“The problem with the show was simply this: When they start telling you in Standards and Practices, ‘Don’t shoot any flame at anybody, don’t step on any buildings or cars,’ then pretty soon, they’ve taken away all the stuff he represents. That became the problem, to maintain a feeling of Godzilla and at the same time cut down everything that he did. We managed to get a fair show out of it. It was OK. Godzooky kind of got the kids going.”
viii. The Patterson Bigfoot Film Stabilised
Someone has spent ages stabilising the famous bigfoot home movie footage – but conjecture as to whether it is real or not still continues…